The Golden Lotus (1974)

REVIEW

The Golden Lotus is an ancient Chinese text, written during an early Dynasty, and has been banned throughout most of Chinese history as a pornographic text.

It tells the tale of a libidinous magistrate, Ximen Qing, who leaps into sexual escapades and treacherous liasons with unsatisfied women. He’s a dirty player, not one to cheer for, as he plots and thickens his way between the thighs of married women.

The film, The Golden Lotus, is a Hong Kong remake from the Shaw Brothers, made in 1974, released in Australia by Siren Visual Entertainment. Billed as an erotic movie, it’s supposed to be naughty daring provocative!

In reality, it’s pretty tame. Sure, by 1974 standards in China, it’s racy, but it’s nothing compared to the infamously surreal pornography from Europe from the disco era.

Basically, what The Golden Lotus gets down to is a couple of flashes of pornography, and several ‘sex’ scenes that are both flaccidly unstimulating and laughable. Yes, you can watch this for camp value.

However, it’s a pretty interesting story, and it made me laugh out loud on some occasions. At the beginning of the film, Ximen wants to steal a married lady from her husband. She’s married to a dwarf who’s named get this ‘3 inch Ding’. Referring, apparently, to his height, not his equipment.

While cultural values are quickly changing in China, there’s still a fair bit of male chauvantistic bullshit in the society. Husbands can get domestically violent, and often spend their time with prostitutes and mistresses. In a way, it’s a lot like American society before the so-called Sexual Revolution in the 60s.

With that in mind, this movie is the perfect weekend movie for jerks and assholes to watch, drinking beer and eating popcorn. I’m sure there’s a segment of the male population that dreams of living like Ximen Qing. What do I mean?

• Ximen Qing is rich without having to do much. Most of his wealth is inherited, or the result of bribery and corruption, leaving his days free to give the ladies the ‘come-hither’ look while their husbands are working.
• When one of his concubines get out of line, he’ll beat the shit out of her. It’s disgusting, and not erotic at all. He loves it, and no one can stop him, because he’s the master.
• He’s evil. He’s got no problem arranging a man’s death so he can sleep with the wife. And if he can steal the wife’s money after sleeping with her great!
• In my opinion, he’s a terrible lover. From my point of view, he stinks. He’s got one move he grabs the girl, swings her in his arms, then kisses her forcefully.

Of course, the women struggles a bit, then succumbs to his ‘talents’. Ximen jumps on top of her and pumps into her, making her ‘moan’ in pain. Asian erotica really likes to depict women in pain when having sex, for some odd reason.

• Unbelievably, the women are ruined after they have sex with Ximen. They can’t stand to sleep with anyone else, and will spend their time and energy trying to get fucked by Ximen again. It’s ludicrous, really.

After this, I don’t have much hope in finding a genuinely erotic Chinese movie, but I’ll just keep trying!

I say

Whatever. It’s as dirty as a 80s comedy, with less nudity, and even more awkward love-making. Still, the dumplings look delicious in the film.

Watch it for

Get out of here! Is that a shockingly young Jackie Chan in the film? Yes, it is. One of his first movies, before the eye surgery. He’s pretty funny, too!

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